I'm sorry to hear about the tough time you are having. I've been there myself, and had to do the same thing. I think the guilt comes from the fact that I always felt like I just gave up, but it took me a while to realize he had given up years ago. The only thing you are guilty of is loving someone so much, you were willing to put yourself on the back burner for a while. (((HAG HUGS))) to you, and if you need to talk, I'm always available.