Guest
I found this today; you guys may have seen it, but here's footage from the funeral:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4eiXKlNgVY
'It's a vertical hold/the things that you're told/for the everyday hero, it all turns to zero'-- Drowse
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Thanks iyokokijo! And of course, watching that, led me to watch a bunch of other things on the Carpenters. I watched again the Made for TV movie from 1989, some talk show clips, past performances, etc. And then I came across this. I don't think I'd ever seen it before:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uGBJlVz5WVg
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I never got to indulge in a Quallude. Do I have Richard Carpenter to blame?
To understand the living, you got to commune with the dead.
Minerva
I recently learned from an interview that Christina Ricci's dog is named Karen Carpenter....
Missing my Pa every day. RIP Daddy ❤️♥️
“Get drunk and sing Elvira”
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Casper, I love you so much baby boy... waking up with you in the house is a blessing every day! Thank you for filling our home and hearts with so much love, joy, laughter and ever so sweet Sammy smiles! We belong together! XOXOX
I am a fan of the Carpenters music and also got interested in Karen's life, at the time I had an eating disorder when I was younger.
I've read many times about Richard being a "creep"/cold/he has "secrets" etc.
Maybe he just has a problem with being open about his feelings, that doesn't necessarily mean he has something to hide.
I have been diagnosed with Asperger's a couple of years ago, and that explained a lot about my behaviour. People have called me "cold" and even "mean" "arrogant". Especially people who do not know me.
Could Richard have Asperger's syndrom, may be? It does fit with his musical talent, wanting to play all the notes perfectly &c, being rigid, not outgoing &c.
Also the Carpenter family did not show emotions, he has not learned that. Karen, too, kept a lot of her emotions inside, though she was an extravert person.
My brother died at the age of 32 from drug abuse. He was recovering, but had liver damage. I have had ED and still have some issues with food & weight, you never recover 100%, I think.
I loved my brother very very much, we were so close people sometimes asked if he was my boyfriend when we were in our late teens/twenties, and there was some jealousy about each other's boyfriends/girlfriends, not like "forbidding" each other to have relationship, just being very critical of the boyfriend/girlfriend.
But we never had incestuous relationship, didn't even hug or kiss a lot, because our family was just not like that.
Maybe it was also like that in the Carpenter family, and Richard Carpenter could be on autistic spectrum.
Of course I do not know, and maybe trying to explain it from my own point of view,
but just want to say that people who are socially awkward, reserved and seem cold, arrogant &c does not mean they do not have feelings, are arrogant or have some terrible secrets.
I have not cried a lot when my brother died, at his funeral I did not feel anything, because I was like a robot [in shock], and that lasted for a long time.
But in the years before that, when we saw he was not doing well, it was terrible and I did cry a lot [not in front of other people].
In a way, it was no surprise he died, because he had been doing drugs for more than 10 years. Everybody wanted to help him, nobody knew how, and he wouldn't let anyone help him, got angry about it and even said our "making a fuss" made his problem worse, because it made him feel more "sick". He thought he had it all under control and that he would stop when he was "ready".
Richard Carpenter seems a kind guy to me, sensitive, although he does not/cannot show it [in public].
I think he does not deserve the mean things that are being said about him. It's awful, he is Karen's brother and she loved him and looked up to him.
Karen seemed to be a very strong-willed person, I do not think anyone could make her do things except herself and [sadly] her anorexia.
I hope you understand what I'm trying to say, my English is not good and it's difficult to express feelings exactly how I feel them.
Hi Elfi... welcome to the forum... so nice to have you here.
Thank you for your quite outstanding post, and for sharing your own, and your family's very personal experiences with us. IMO, you are right on point with the input about the inner workings of the Carpenter family, and the many possible reasons that would explain the family dynamics, relationships, and inability to outwardly express love and emotion.
Your relationship with your own brother is very insightful, and ITA with your opinions about Richard and his behaviors, as well as the dynamics of the way he and Karen related to each other, especially considering the family as a whole. Regardless of speculation by outsiders, ITA with you, and have never believed there was anything incestuous between them whatsoever, but rather much, much more as you described here.
Once again, thank you for this great post. I'm so very sorry for the loss of your brother, and truly appreciate you sharing so much about yourself and your family. There are so many similarities to Karen, Richard, and their family, and genuinely helped me, and many others reading this, relate to them, their brother/sister relationship, and lives.
BTW Elfi, your English is EXCELLENT, and you express yourself and your feelings extremely well... look forward to hearing more from you!
Last edited by Cynful; 10-02-2015 at 04:53 PM.
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Casper, I love you so much baby boy... waking up with you in the house is a blessing every day! Thank you for filling our home and hearts with so much love, joy, laughter and ever so sweet Sammy smiles! We belong together! XOXOX
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Last edited by Elfi; 10-05-2015 at 10:40 PM.
...
Last edited by Elfi; 10-05-2015 at 10:41 PM.
Cynful, thank you very much.
Yes, but how do you do that? Sorry, I'm new.
Copy and past the last two comments into that first one.
Go to Post #860 and copy it into your clipboard
--look at the little task bar on the bottom right side of the post.
--click on Edit Text
--click on Delete
--look at the bottom left of the post
--write out a reason why you are deleting (option)
--click Delete
Go to Post #859
--paste your copy of Post #860
--Click Save
Go to Post 861 and repeat process.
From now on, if you have a sudden thought just after posting, instead of creating a new post, edit that thought into the one you just posted. Posts may be consecutive if they are hours apart, but not minutes.
If you have more questions, please contact a staff member.
anyone have her last photo that was taken
Everyone must die but not everyone has lived
These are such beautiful photos.... Karen and her Samoyed dog, named Mush. Lovely to know that she had at least some totally sweet and unconditional love in her life.
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Casper, I love you so much baby boy... waking up with you in the house is a blessing every day! Thank you for filling our home and hearts with so much love, joy, laughter and ever so sweet Sammy smiles! We belong together! XOXOX
Awww... thanks for posting, Cyn! I'm trying to convince hubby that our need dog needs to be a Samoyed. I love the story of how you got Casper.
It's a comfort that Karen had some unconditional love in her life.
Last edited by Aviatrix; 12-16-2015 at 08:53 PM. Reason: Calling Cyn "Fun" - Darn auto-correct! :p
Hey, Death Hags. I've visited often but never commented. I must say that this thread dedicated to the late, great Karen Carpenter is very enlightening, to say the least.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hs50xc3Qn40
This Nationwide interview was 10/22/1981, her and Tom Burris separated 11/9/1981. Then, she went to Manhattan for a year, rented an apartment there while for almost a year seeing Dr. Levenkron and then being admitted until November 1982. Came back to her Condo at The Century Towers in LA, collapsed at the Newville house and died in Downey of Ipecac Syrup poisoning February 4th, 1983. Ok, it's almost like she was anorexic and also bulimic, too.
Didn't really over-exercise, instead taking thyroid replacement medication and laxatives and didn't eat... at least in front of people. Then after getting treatment for almost a year in NYC she instead was taking Ipecac (and also Ativan for anxiety?) after eating normal portions of food but throwing it up instead of taking the 80-90 Dulcolax laxatives a day + Synthroid. So maybe she was binging a normal amount of food and purging it? or... binging a lot of food to keep her weight up at around 106-108 to keep up appearances then purging it so she wouldn't gain any more weight. It's still so confusing. With the cause of death, the disease itself, the medications, and from everything I've seen on docs or read in books. Plus, from people in this forum or online there's supposedly some big secret being kept about the family and it has something to do with Richard but nobody ever spells it out. Like some tin-foil hat Carpenter conspiracy. Something about a rumor around Downey that there's some big secret but there's gag orders on people and hush money paid after the funeral to keep the family name in good standing. Threats of RC suing people? I don't know about all that, seems a bit crazy but there was a lot of seemingly-odd things to the whole entire story. Yes, I did read/own a copy of Little Girl Blue and have seen every documentary that I could find.
Some other questions I have are on the autopsy report, also I've seen the documentary dealing with the Autopsy... http://www.autopsyfiles.org/reports/...ren_report.pdf
There's a lot of weird stuff in there, and also things that were lied about, for some reason? if the autopsy report is indeed correct.
1. Some reports say she was found in her bedroom closet, nude, with a robe in her hand? Including what her parents said. That Agnes dressed her? Maybe in the red jogging suit. idk? The whole story about calling up from the kitchen and getting no answer from KC in the bedroom...
The autopsy report states Agnes found her on the kitchen floor. Not the bedroom. Also says she was in a red jogging suit with a vial of Ativan 2mg transported to Downey Community Hospital. The jogging suit was given back to Evelyn Wallace before the autopsy?
2. I don't know about needle marks and what they do when they try to revive someone at an ER but the autopsy report says "Multiple needle puncture marks are seen in the groin bilaterally". Ok, wtf? Why? Is that some kind of nitro shot they try to jump start a heart with or something?
3. The stomach contains an estimated 50 to 60 cc. of a dark green, dry and hydrous material which has the consistency of dried tea
leaves. No solid material or identifiable food is seen.
No pills, capsules or other forms of medications are identifiable.
Was that the lettuce from the shrimp salad and taco from the night before? or was she eating freaking tea leaves? Unless she laxitived that out, or had a BM that morning already where is the digested food? That's weird.
4.
Symptoms Cardiac arrest.
Laboratory Data: 1,110 Blood Glucose Level.
Remarks: Anorexia Nervosa / Depression.
In my opinion the immediate cause of death is: Hyperosmolar Coma.
One word, wow. 1110 blood glucose level? That's insane.
Was she so dehydrated that it dehydrated the lettuce she ate from the night before?
This forum keeps changing my copy-paste font, so sorry about that.
Also, one more thing I find strange is that she was supposed to sign the divorce papers THE DAY she died. I love Karen and all the music but this whole story both fascinates and confuses me as much as it just makes me sad that this happened... and happened to such a kick ass, talented woman like Karen.
Sounds like another mysterious celebrity death.
I found, to my taste, the music always sounded like one long blur. After the radio stations played their early hits together, listening became taxing. Had she lived and faded from popularity, we'd be watching them as two 70 year olds trying to recreate their glory songs on PBS during pledge drives.
Like Brussell sprouts, I just don't want them.
Like them or not they were very popular and their music is still popular today. The tragedy is that a young woman was driven to her death because of a weight fixation.
Siameseman
"The sites I saw encouraged negative things said about Karen but banned the people that posted anything about her brother especially when they talked about him PHYSICALLY and SEXUALLY abusing Karen or what he DID to her on February 4, 1983 (its bad)."
Spill it. What do you think happened? You make it sound like Richard sexually abused Karen, raped her, and then murdered her.
Please reply.
I sure would like to know if Richard did something to Karen or what he did to her. Most agree that she was sexually abused as a kid, but nobody says who did it. I would hate to think Richard might have done something to her to cause her death. I remember reading about how strange he acted on the set of the made-for-tv movie, The Karen Carpenter Story and how he was overheard sobbing, "I'm so sorry, Karen. Please, please forgive me!"
I've never heard, or read, things about her being sexually abused. Where is a source for this?
Did read about Richard being a pain to the actors on the set of that movie, and saying that which you wrote, but I gathered it as he was upset about how some of the scenes were going. Cynthia Gibb said he was making things difficult on set.
There's a lot of seemingly weird things, and some people have said some things that really do make a person wonder. I really don't think it goes as far as some people are hinting at or assuming, especially on this forum. It would have come out already even with RC's money if there was some major foul play thing like sexual abuse, or even murder involved. During that Little Girl Blue session with her old friends someone would have said something, although, they do say they won't "sell her out" by revealing a bunch of personal dirt they may know because it would be betraying her friendship.
Just what did Richard do on Feb. 4th, 1983 that was so bad?
I've read in here he yelled and screamed at her corpse at the hospital? idk. That's possible. What'd he do tell her to go fuck herself or something? As far as I know he got woken up at the Lubec house and he drove over to the Newville house while the ambulance was taking off. Sounds legit. What doesn't sound right is all the stuff I mentioned above in that post about that autopsy report... closet upstairs OR kitchen... The paramedic and 'rents said upstairs closet nude, autospy report says kitchen with a red jogging suit on.
According to this Siameseman forumer, (who hasn't logged on in 5 years) the autopsy report was changed and RC did some very horrible thing to her the day she died. Also, Siameseman was supposedly kicked off other forums for hinting at all this crazy stuff about Richard. The A&M forum as well.
Personally I think Karen would hate you for saying stuff like that... and Harold didn't do a damn thing to Karen. I don't get that vibe at all.
I don't think they are too credible with all their hinting and inneundo speak. Come back from the dead and reply, Siameseman.
The stories about Karen being sexually abused have circulated for so many years that I can't even remember where I first heard them. One theory is that she was abused by a member of the extended family, but I never have heard the name of the person. The theory is that this trauma played a big role in the development of her eating disorder. One of many theories.
That could very well all be just rumors. Possible, idk? It's also possible she had "closeness issues" to RC, as in she wanted someone who was like her brother but that's also just assumptions. Added drama. I read that she slept in his old room upstairs in his old bed the night before she died supposedly because he had a TV and VCR in there... and watched an old episode of Magnum P.I. before falling asleep. I don't know how they got so detailed with that info.
Maybe she was just a overweight kid (I can relate) and some people said something. Putting her out from behind her drums and into the spotlight didn't help with any body issues. There was hints that Terry Ellis, her ex was physically abusing her. Then, rumors of fights with that gold-digger douche Tom Burris. He also said he didn't want to touch or have kids with her calling her "a bag of bones" while spending all her money. That had to have caused some considerable mental anguish.
RC's ex-girlfriend/Karen's former hair & makeup person said that if Karen were still alive today chances are good RC wouldn't be married to anyone. She was the one that was at the Lubec St. house they both lived in... and then KC got pissed enough to move out to the condo. According to her, Agnes and Karen both sabotaged her relationship with Richard. I always took that as a weird statement to make.
Btw, that previous post wasn't directed at you Daddy13, sorry if you took any offense. It was mainly at Siameseman, wherever they are now? lol
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cb00pN1TVw0
She sounds like Karen.
I had never heard of it being an extended family member, but I could totally see that, and if not a family member, maybe a family friend or neighbor. I've always thought their sudden move to California was a little off. They moved to California before they could even sell their house! Richard had only been playing the piano for like 3 years when they decided he'd probably be the next Liberace (or something like that). It's not like they couldn't have waited until they were in a better place financially, etc, before moving... I mean, he was still a minor! I've always thought that while Richard's success was a factor, there was something else that propelled them forward quickly and caused them to move.
Karen would have been 66 today!
Here she is with a Disney cake... she loved all things Disney!
Maybe Richard was saying sorry because he felt guilty for making fun of her weight and it hit him finally about what she went through. Maybe she became anorexic because she felt she had no control in her life, not from being sexually abused.
It's strange... Richard made fun of her weight... she became anorexic. The Jackson Family brothers made fun of Michael's nose, and he became obsessed with making his nose smaller. Some creative people are extra sensitive. Too bad they just didn't tell their verbally abusive siblings to go to hell, instead of taking it to heart and acting on the criticism.
Actually, if you read either Carpenters bios, the Coleman or the newer, unbiased, "Little Girl Blue", Richard never made fun of Karen's weight nor did any newspaper/magazine/critic ever make a comment about Karen's weight. Richard has said several times since the Karen Carpenter Story made for TV movie aired. They had to add some things for dramatic element. People can't imagine starving themselves, but it is maybe more understandable/relatable if it was a reaction to a comment like that? Anyway, its been documented by Richard and in both bios that once they were famous... he'd never mentioned her weight.
It is a good point, though, someone just mentioned... I'm not entirely convinced that her anorexia was fueled by sexual abuse. Sure, it seems like an easy accusation to make considering the years of rumors, but, and I’m not an eating disorders expert by any means, but if it were true, I would think that the disease would have presented itself when she was much younger. It does seem that because her mother, Agnes was so controlling and once they became famous, she was controlled by Richard and the Record company and the demands of a work schedule that allowed for no downtime or alone time would be enough for me to find a way to control just a sliver of myself.
Yeah, I never heard it was Richard that said anything about her weight either. I thought someone who was interviewing them once said something about her being chubby or something and that would pretty much do it.
To understand the living, you got to commune with the dead.
Minerva
If I'm wrong, Trekgrrl, I apologize to Richard Carpenter, but of course he would say that he never said anything about her weight... If I told someone they were fat and they died of anorexia, I don't think I'd want to admit it.
Part of the problem McCourt was that they had the time and money to obsess on things like their weight and their noses.
LOL McCourt, that's what she said~
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xPFZqz3YOT8 For those of you who never heard this wonderful woman sing....RIP Karen