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Thread: You know you're Mexican when...

  1. #1
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    You know you're Mexican when...

    **this has always cracked me up, i am half mexican, so i mean no offense, just some silly humour, many of our south of the border friends might relate (church lady look)

    [SIZE=4]You Know You're Mexican When...

    You have ever been hit by a chancla. ( a slipper)

    You grew up scared by something called "El Cucuy." (AKA the boogie man)

    Others tell you to stop screaming when you are really just talking.

    You light a candle on the night of the Lotto drawing.

    You use your lips to point something out.

    You constantly refer to cereal as "con fleis". (messed up way to say corn flakes)

    Your mother yells at the top of her lungs to call you to dinner even if it's a one bedroom apartment.

    You can dance ranchera, cumbia or salsa without music.

    You use "manteca" (lard) instead of olive oil and can't figure out why your booty is getting bigger.

    You call your sneakers "tenees".

    You have at least thirty cousins.

    You can't imagine anyone not liking spicy food.

    You are in a 5-passenger car with 7 people in it and a person shouting "subanse, todavia caben". (basically were saying there's still room)

    Whenever you feel under the weather, you compulsively dab on some "Vics" vapor rub all over your chest and inside your nostrils.

    Your mom packs your "lonchera" everyday. (lonchera is your lunch)

    You or someone you know uses "Tres Flores" in their hair. (Tres Flores is a hair product that translates to three flowers.)

    Tamales, champurrado, posole and menudo (all Mexican foods) are must haves on Thanksgiving.

    There is more Corona than punch at little Juanito's birthday party.

    There is at least one member in your family name Maria, Guadalupe, Juan, Jose, or Jesus.

    Everyone still thinks Cesar Chavez is the best boxer even if he lost against Oscar De La Hoya.

    You've gone to the Pulgamarket every weekend for years.

    You step into a house that has all those little figurines taking up every inch of space on/under the TV.

    You have a porcelain cat, dog, Buddha, or elephant in your living room.

    You have plastic slipcovers on your sofas.

    You swear "Choco Mil" is the same as Slim Fast and try to lose weight by drinking it. (Choco Mil is more or less Chocolate milk)

    You have a drunk uncle/aunt.

    You're still afraid to open that umbrella in your house.

    You not only know who Don Francisco from Sabado Gigante (Giant Saturday) is, but you tell people he's your tio. (tio=uncle)

    Your mother, tia (aunt) or hermana's (sister) hair is blackcherry, "Sun in" red or a burgundy that would make Celia Cruz jealous.

    You always try to find out what town another fellow Latino's family is from.

    You have ever had to "beepiar" a friend on their pager.

    You wear your Sunday best to do laundry at the laundrymat and go grocery shopping.

    You have told your kid not to walk the floor barefoot or they'll catch a cold.

    You go to a wedding or Quinceañera, gossip about how bad the comida (food) is, but be the first to take a plato (plate) to go.

    You have a bottle of Tapatio (type of hot sauce) in your purse.

    Your cousins are delinquents / hootchies.

    You have a chola (gangster) in your barrio (neighborhood) named "La Flaca" (skinny) who's bigger than a house.

    You think Cristina trumps Oprah any day.

    Just about everyone you meet can't understand that Mexican is an ethnic group not a race and that Mexicans come in all shades and physical features.

    You know a chola (gangster) named "La Shy Girl" who is loud and obnoxious.

    You need to point out how much something you just bought cost.

    You go to a gringa (non-Hispanic) friend's house for dinner and don't understand the concept of sitting at a table.

    You've tried to bring a mango back to the US from Mexico, and a bonus point if you actually made it all the way home with it.

    You have a bottle of Bacardi or Tequila in your house right now.

    You drive a "Cheby", an "Ohsmobeel" or a "Bolswahgon"

    You're proud to be Mexican - and you pass these jokes on to all your Mexican friends![/SIZE]
    Last edited by hell0kitty; 10-16-2008 at 12:55 AM.
    pull the string!

  2. #2
    Armcast Guest
    Damn...I can identify with all of those...Viva La Raza!



  3. #3
    Armcast Guest




  4. #4
    Seagorath Guest
    ...your name is Pedro and you're the mascot of South of the Border...


  5. #5
    Frank 'N' Howie Guest
    HOLY CRAP!!! I didn't even know I was Mexican! I can relate with about half of those...I coulda swore I was just a borin honkey! Thanks for showin me my roots Hello!!!

  6. #6
    Mrs. Watson Guest
    You could change a few words here and there and it would equally apply to we Italians.

    Especially the plastic slip covers and the booze (Sambuca and Dago Red) and the thugs.

  7. #7
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    So true So true

    You go to a wedding or Quinceañera, gossip about how bad the comida (food) is, but be the first to take a plato (plate) to go.
    It's All Gravy Baby [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  8. #8
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    Oh I have one!!!!

    You know you are a mexican when your aunt has every back issue of "ALARMA"
    It's All Gravy Baby [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  9. #9
    Guest Guest
    how about everytime someone says "no way"........ you giggle......

  10. #10
    Guest Guest
    ^^^^^ Mexicans will get this.........

  11. #11
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    How about when you look in the mirror, and your doing your hair and wish the "featherback" look would come back.
    It's All Gravy Baby [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  12. #12
    Guest Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by eca1094 View Post
    How about when you look in the mirror, and your doing your hair and wish the "featherback" look would come back.
    LOL.......... everyday.... everyday....

  13. #13
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    lmao!!!!! why do we all have weight problems. coz our abuelitas were always feeding us tamales for breakfast lunch and dinner, and two dozen to take home mijita!and two full glases of orchata, so full of goodness! (rice drink, mainly composed of sugar lol)
    pull the string!

  14. #14
    Frank 'N' Howie Guest
    Hey Hello! Is that anythin like biscuts and gravy...

  15. #15
    Armcast Guest
    My girlfriend (who's anglo) went with us to a family reunion about a year ago. On the way home, she was talking to her sister on the phone and saying how unusual it was that a lot of the women there were named "Tia"...

  16. #16
    Armcast Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by hell0kitty View Post
    lmao!!!!! why do we all have weight problems. coz our abuelitas were always feeding us tamales for breakfast lunch and dinner, and two dozen to take home mijita!and two full glases of orchata, so full of goodness! (rice drink, mainly composed of sugar lol)

    oh my...remember the Christmas holidays are coming up! Tamales will be served every freakin' day at every freakin' aunt's house...last year I at so many tamales that I dreamed I was being wrapped in a corn husk I shit you not...

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by howDIDyouBUYit? View Post
    HOLY CRAP!!! I didn't even know I was Mexican! I can relate with about half of those...I coulda swore I was just a borin honkey! Thanks for showin me my roots Hello!!!
    by supreme order of our lady of taco bell, i now proclaim you as mexican jules, and will anoint you with tapatio sauce!!!!
    pull the string!

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Armcast View Post
    oh my...remember the Christmas holidays are coming up! Tamales will be served every freakin' day at every freakin' aunt's house...last year I at so many tamales that I dreamed I was being wrapped in a corn husk I shit you not...
    dang arm i envy you, i'd blow up parliament here for just one dozen pork tamales at christmas! lmaooooooooo enjoy!!!!!
    pull the string!

  19. #19
    Guest Guest
    I know my kids are mexicans.......... they don't eat corn.....they eat elote..

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by howDIDyouBUYit? View Post
    Hey Hello! Is that anythin like biscuts and gravy...
    its a mexican staple jules and a delcious hot sauce that can be put on anything from an ear of corn, to a bowl of cereal lmao, you have to keep one in your purse tho, along with the 'really cute salt and pepper shakers that i saw in that restaurant' lmao! (dang now that i think of it i actually lifted a 'really cute maple syrup dispenser' i saw once in a restaurant, five finger discounted, took home, it was admired by all the 'tia's' lmaooooooooooo) dang what a crook i am lol
    pull the string!

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jessica Rabbit View Post
    I know my kids are mexicans.......... they don't eat corn.....they eat elote..

    now you're talkin, smothered in low fat butter and tapatio sauce...i'm in heaven!
    pull the string!

  22. #22
    Armcast Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by hell0kitty View Post
    by supreme order of our lady of taco bell, i now proclaim you as mexican jules, and will anoint you with tapatio sauce!!!!

    You won't need a badge because badges, we don't need no stinkin' badges...


  23. #23
    Guest Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by hell0kitty View Post
    now you're talkin, smothered in low fat butter and tapatio sauce...i'm in heaven!
    hells yeah............

    you know you're Mexican when your youngest eats jalepenos and calls them pickles.........

  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Armcast View Post
    My girlfriend (who's anglo) went with us to a family reunion about a year ago. On the way home, she was talking to her sister on the phone and saying how unusual it was that a lot of the women there were named "Tia"...
    a boyfriend of mine said the same thing! ha ha ha. i'm an undercover mexican, i look so white, but my mom is all mexicana.
    "I'm not great at the advice, can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?"



  25. #25
    Guest Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by xoxojessicaxoxo View Post
    a boyfriend of mine said the same thing! ha ha ha. i'm an undercover mexican, i look so white, but my mom is all mexicana.
    people think I'm white.... but mom is half mexican, half spanish - dad is full mexican...... you can see a pic of my dad in my albums........

    they call me the lightest shade of brown...and my sister is a deep fried mexican....... I'll find a pic to post

  26. #26
    Frank 'N' Howie Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by hell0kitty View Post
    by supreme order of our lady of taco bell, i now proclaim you as mexican jules, and will anoint you with tapatio sauce!!!!
    *Runs to the store to stock up on mow taco hell stuff for Hello*

  27. #27
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    going to tijuana on the weekends to bring home tequila, was a sacrosanct event on sundays! us kids would beg for 'pirouli's' those little pointy sugarpops sold on every corner. heck my honeymoon was spent in ensenada lol
    pull the string!

  28. #28
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    every person in my family judges mexican restaurants by their tortilla quality, it ain't home made, we don't go back. gotta have the hand print!
    "I'm not great at the advice, can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?"



  29. #29
    D3LIVI?N Guest

    You know your Mexican when.....

    Everyones clothes reak of too much fabric softener.

  30. #30
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    ya wanna laff, my husband who is pure aristocratic english, makes us tortillas de harina, and corn tortillas from masa harina now! i even cook a whole pig in front of the house on a spit, play rancheras on the loud speaker, have a statue of our lady of guadalupe on the porch, and i live in new zealand! the property values have now dropped to an all time low! lmaoooooooo (is the mexican neighbourhood in wanganui)
    pull the string!

  31. #31
    Frank 'N' Howie Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by hell0kitty View Post
    ya wanna laff, my husband who is pure aristocratic english, makes us tortillas de harina, and corn tortillas from masa harina now! i even cook a whole pig in front of the house on a spit, play rancheras on the loud speaker, have a statue of our lady of guadalupe on the porch, and i live in new zealand! the property values have now dropped to an all time low! lmaoooooooo (is the mexican neighbourhood in wanganui)
    I literally pissed my pants when I read this...Bwahahahahahah!!!

  32. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by Delivian View Post
    Everyones clothes reak of too much fabric softener.
    lmao!!!!!!!!!!!!
    pull the string!

  33. #33
    Armcast Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Delivian View Post
    Everyones clothes reak of too much fabric softener.
    Downy is a Fragrance!

    Extra points if you use the Mexican version: Suavitel.

  34. #34
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    thyroid, hell, thats too many tamales, an over active fork, and doting tia's lmao
    pull the string!

  35. #35
    Armcast Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by hell0kitty View Post
    thyroid, hell, thats too many tamales, an over active fork, and doting tia's lmao

    I'm going to Disneyworld!

  36. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Armcast View Post
    Downy is a Fragrance!

    Extra points if you use the Mexican version: Suavitel.

    LMAOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! exactly, and when we have a cough? what else but a scarf around your neck, turpentine smothered all over your chest, and a gallon bottle of 'no-tos' from the dollar store lmao
    pull the string!

  37. #37
    Armcast Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by hell0kitty View Post
    LMAOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! exactly, and when we have a cough? what else but a scarf around your neck, turpentine smothered all over your chest, and a gallon bottle of 'no-tos' from the dollar store lmao
    don't forget to drink plenty of Sprite or 7-Up

  38. #38
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    still miss my mexican soap operas, where every no woman was a virgin, and every man longed for a virgin!
    pull the string!

  39. #39
    Guest Guest

  40. #40
    Noelle Page Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Jessica Rabbit View Post
    how about everytime someone says "no way"........ you giggle......

    Awright, you got me curious. Is "noway" a dirty word in Spanish or something?

  41. #41
    Guest Guest
    ^^^........everyone says I'm the lechera's kid

  42. #42
    Guest Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Noelle Page View Post
    Awright, you got me curious. Is "noway" a dirty word in Spanish or something?
    Wey.... is a bad word in spanish..........

  43. #43
    Armcast Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by hell0kitty View Post
    still miss my mexican soap operas, where every no woman was a virgin, and every man longed for a virgin!

    every "no" woman I knew was a virgin and unfortunately stayed that way after our relationships ended dammit...

  44. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jessica Rabbit View Post
    ^^^........everyone says I'm the lechera's kid
    yes, or your dad's brother's? lmaooooooooo
    pull the string!

  45. #45
    Noelle Page Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Jessica Rabbit View Post
    Wey.... is a bad word in spanish..........


    AND..........? Oh never mind! Good to know, though, we just won't say it, lol!

    When my mother (from the U.K.) talked about "knocking people up" (ie visiting them), she'd get weird looks. always something.
    Last edited by Noelle Page; 10-16-2008 at 01:26 PM.

  46. #46
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    a first date......inspections by the father, brothers, tio's. and all this, for a drive to sav'on's for an ice cream cone and straight back............
    pull the string!

  47. #47
    Armcast Guest
    We use "güey" (pronounced way) when we describe an "indecent man"... My male friends and I refer to each other in that fashion...cabrones

  48. #48
    Armcast Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by hell0kitty View Post
    a first date......inspections by the father, brothers, tio's. and all this, for a drive to sav'on's for an ice cream cone and straight back............

    you have to ask permission from the dad first!!!!!!!!!!! very, very important!

  49. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by Armcast View Post
    you have to ask permission from the dad first!!!!!!!!!!! very, very important!
    oh yes! dad has to be wearing a scowl, young pendejo must be wearing a suit........ lmaooooooo


    las tia's (all named 'la rosie')

    Last edited by hell0kitty; 10-17-2008 at 02:04 AM.
    pull the string!

  50. 10-16-2008, 01:28 PM

  51. #50
    Guest Guest
    My dad always scared the hell out of every guy who came around.......

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